Your Own Executive Coach
36 Stories - Each Has a Communication Principle
|Each conversation requires a clear personal objective BEFORE each conversation starts.
|What Does Diversity Mean?
|Knowing our own strengths and respecting strengths of others bridges diversity gap.
|Our Experiences of Authority
|When we know our experience of authority, we can communicate in any situation, with anyone.
|I Have the Right to Speak Up
|Disrespect of authority causes career derailment.
|She's Shy, She's Aggressive
|Avoid "labeling" people. Describing specific behavior sets both parties free.
|Learning to Give/Receive Praise is Essential
|Practicing how to receive praise breaks old habits.
|New Definition for Type A Personality
|Giving praise drives Type A people crazy unless it's specific.
|I Don't Want Your Gift
|Accepting gifts is a learned process Ð particularly if we don't think we deserve it.
|People Don't Listen to "Solutions"
|A requirement of communications is to never tell someone something they already know.
|We Never Need to Justify Our Behavior
|We can conserve our time and energy: eliminate justifications.
|Changing Objectives in Middle of a Conversation
|Quick way to overcome a deteriorating conversation.
|People Can Think About Only Thing at a Time
|Avoid pain and anger and stay focused on one idea.
to Respond to
"Shut Up and Listen to Me."
|There are "choices" of different Exit Strategies to avoid abuse in conversations.
|How Will You Speak or Listen Differently Next Time
|I accept 100% responsibility for my listening and speaking, no matter what the other person is doing.
|How Do You React to Being Asked to Volunteer?
|We need to bridge the gap between "fantasy" Ð what we think about, and "reality" Ð what person actually said.
|Always Give People a Choice
|Being flexible (choices) in difficult conversations is essential to success.
|Which Skill to Use When We Get Mad
|We must be skilled listeners and speakers to overcome difficult conversations.
|Only 5% of People are Skilled Listeners - Are You?
|When we can describe the fundamentals of listening, we become part of the 5% who know how to listen.
|Listening is Hard Work
|Breaking habits takes practice and time.
|What Are You Missing When You Listen?
|When we become skilled listeners, we discover how much we miss in life Ð relationships, information, self-esteem.
|What Emotions Do You Hear?
|We continually misunderstand people and each other, until we listen "specifically."
|Do You Yell at People?
|Yelling is in the ears of the beholder. We need to know our reactions to loud voices.
|"Bullsh_t" is an aggressive word - Or is it?
|Some people use strong language to make a point, not attack. Do we "hear the difference?"
|How to Handle Emotional People
|When we "handle" emotional people, we set ourselves free to meet our own objectives.
|To Execute=inflict punishment, To Lead=Influence
|We can "influence" people trying to inflict punishment by listening to them.
|People Who Yell Attack Our Self-Esteem
|We can protect our self-esteem when we avoid reacting to loud, insulting communications.
|Our Bodies "Speak Our Minds"
|We need to "speak" confidently Ð voice, body, words say the same thing Ð otherwise, we are misinterpreted.
|He Said Your Care So Much, And People Don't Trust You
|If we expect people to trust us, we need to communicate "trust" of them.
|Small Talk is a Waste of Time
|We waste our time and energy if we speak before people are ready to listen.
|My Staff Gives Me Too Much Information
|The surest way to get to the heart of an executive is to give ONLY the information he/she needs.
|Who Knows Nothing About Football
|In every conversation, we need to start with language listener understands, not impress them with how "smart" we are.
|Selling "Benefits" of a Physical Examination
|Learn to speak benefits Ð pain or gain. People are not interested in the details.
|People Solve Their Own Problems
|Want to be a successful coach? Listen to people until they solve their own problems. Refrain from telling them what to do.
|"Dad, Dad, You Have to Drive Me to Basketball Practice."
|Once we discover we always have the last word, we are free to choose.
|What Will I Do With People Who Withhold Information?
|Avoid "judging someone's motive. Instead, be "responsible" to discover what they need.
|Eliminating a Stutter Put Me Back on Fast Track Career
|Most Communication behaviors are "learned." Once we discover why we learned them, we are "free" to relearn new ones.
©2002 Peter deLisser. All rights reserved.