Be Your Own Executive Coach
36 Stories - Each Has a Communication Principle

Page Title Principle
4 Setting Objectives Each conversation requires a clear personal objective BEFORE each conversation starts.
11 What Does Diversity Mean? Knowing our own strengths and respecting strengths of others bridges diversity gap.
14 Our Experiences of Authority When we know our experience of authority, we can communicate in any situation, with anyone.
18 I Have the Right to Speak Up Disrespect of authority causes career derailment.
23 She's Shy, She's Aggressive Avoid "labeling" people. Describing specific behavior sets both parties free.
25 Learning to Give/Receive Praise is Essential Practicing how to receive praise breaks old habits.
26 New Definition for Type A Personality Giving praise drives Type A people crazy unless it's specific.
27 I Don't Want Your Gift Accepting gifts is a learned process particularly if we don't think we deserve it.
29 People Don't Listen to "Solutions" A requirement of communications is to never tell someone something they already know.
31 We Never Need to Justify Our Behavior We can conserve our time and energy: eliminate justifications.
35 Changing Objectives in Middle of a Conversation Quick way to overcome a deteriorating conversation.
37 People Can Think About Only Thing at a Time Avoid pain and anger and stay focused on one idea.
39 How to Respond to
"Shut Up and Listen to Me."
There are "choices" of different Exit Strategies to avoid abuse in conversations.
41 How Will You Speak or Listen Differently Next Time I accept 100% responsibility for my listening and speaking, no matter what the other person is doing.
46 How Do You React to Being Asked to Volunteer? We need to bridge the gap between "fantasy" what we think about, and "reality" what person actually said.
48 Always Give People a Choice Being flexible (choices) in difficult conversations is essential to success.
50 Which Skill to Use When We Get Mad We must be skilled listeners and speakers to overcome difficult conversations.
52 Only 5% of People are Skilled Listeners - Are You? When we can describe the fundamentals of listening, we become part of the 5% who know how to listen.
53 Listening is Hard Work Breaking habits takes practice and time.
54 What Are You Missing When You Listen? When we become skilled listeners, we discover how much we miss in life relationships, information, self-esteem.
59 What Emotions Do You Hear? We continually misunderstand people and each other, until we listen "specifically."
60 Do You Yell at People? Yelling is in the ears of the beholder. We need to know our reactions to loud voices.
62 "Bullsh_t" is an aggressive word - Or is it? Some people use strong language to make a point, not attack. Do we "hear the difference?"
65 How to Handle Emotional People When we "handle" emotional people, we set ourselves free to meet our own objectives.
70 To Execute=inflict punishment, To Lead=Influence We can "influence" people trying to inflict punishment by listening to them.
73 People Who Yell Attack Our Self-Esteem We can protect our self-esteem when we avoid reacting to loud, insulting communications.
74 Our Bodies "Speak Our Minds" We need to "speak" confidently voice, body, words say the same thing otherwise, we are misinterpreted.
86 He Said Your Care So Much, And People Don't Trust You If we expect people to trust us, we need to communicate "trust" of them.
90 Small Talk is a Waste of Time We waste our time and energy if we speak before people are ready to listen.
92 My Staff Gives Me Too Much Information The surest way to get to the heart of an executive is to give ONLY the information he/she needs.
93 Who Knows Nothing About Football In every conversation, we need to start with language listener understands, not impress them with how "smart" we are.
102 Selling "Benefits" of a Physical Examination Learn to speak benefits pain or gain. People are not interested in the details.
120 People Solve Their Own Problems Want to be a successful coach? Listen to people until they solve their own problems. Refrain from telling them what to do.
121 "Dad, Dad, You Have to Drive Me to Basketball Practice." Once we discover we always have the last word, we are free to choose.
126 What Will I Do With People Who Withhold Information? Avoid "judging someone's motive. Instead, be "responsible" to discover what they need.
140 Eliminating a Stutter Put Me Back on Fast Track Career Most Communication behaviors are "learned." Once we discover why we learned them, we are "free" to relearn new ones.




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©2002 Peter deLisser. All rights reserved.